Kimball

I have found myself getting frustrated with Kimball lately. I know I shouldn’t, he can’t help most of the things that bug me, because of his Sensory Integration Dysfunction (SID). But it really can get hard sometimes. I love this kid with all of my heart, but wow! It takes a lot of work. The biggest thing that has been so frustrating is that Kimball is still not potty trained. It is not that he is lazy, but he actually can not feel the urge. We have to train him to recognize the feelings. Can we say, HARD and it makes for some really interesting conversations. He is getting really good at the pee part. I still have to remind him, all the time, but he will go. Well, he will go as long as he is in the mood. If he is not, and I invite him, he will melt down. Screaming, kicking, and yelling. I then have to work with him to use words and to just tell me no. Oh, the tantrums can drive me nuts, but I have to remain calm. I have to work with him through it. Pooping is a whole other story. He still doesn’t use the toilet. We are having him learn to clean himself up when he has an accident. Of course I am watching and helping along. It seems to help him come tell us sooner, so “it won’t squish all of my butt”. That is the step in the right directions. He use to sit in it forever, because he can’t feel it. Another thing that has been a little frustrating, is Kimball is attached to his “buggy buggy” blanket. This is how he can deal with stressful situations. He has to have this blanket! He loves it. He received it as a gift from some of our wonderful neighbors when he was born. He as never really been attached to anything but this blanket. When he gets scared he will put the blanket on his head and slowly, as he is comfortable with the situation, he will come out. If he gets stressed out he will rub the blanket to calm down. It is best friend. At time we have to treat it like a human or he will melt down. We have been known to kiss buggy buggy blanket goodnight and snuggle it to help it feel better. Whatever it takes. As you can guess, because is has been such well loved (and needed) blanket it is about dead. It is melting away everyday. I have patched, stitched and prayed that this blanket will last. I don’t know what he would do with out it. I soon found myself on a quest to find more buggy buggy fabric. I knew it was going to be hard; it was made almost five years ago. I started searching the Internet. But how do you find a certain type of fabric when you have to clue as to information about it. So I started. After a few days I found it! I really couldn’t believe it. It is now almost seven dollars a yard and shipping is about the same price but it is worth it. I even went to a few fabric stores to see if they would order a bolt in for me, but they said that they couldn’t and to buy all I could on line because it won’t be around for much long. It is going to be a bigger expense then I thought, and I wouldn’t do this for any other kid, but Kimball needs this.
With all of these frustrations I do have to count myself lucky. I have a little boy who will always love to snuggle and give hugs. Kimball craves deep hugs and touch. It is another part of his SID. He loves to run into you at full speed and then squeeze you with all of his might. He loves to take a nap next to me. He will reach out and hold my hand and fall asleep that way. It melts my heart. He is also very in tune with how people feel. He is very in tune with peoples emotions. I once said, “Kimball you melt my heart.” He got very concerned and said, “Mom, I have lots of hearts, you can have one of mine.” To this day if I say that saying to anyone, if he hears it he will come up and hand me one of his hearts. If he thinks you are sad, or you are not having something to play with he will come up and cover you up with his buggy buggy blanket. The kid has a heart the size of Texas. I guess all these wonderful things make up for all the frustrating things. I know that he will get the potty training down and I know that he will learn how to deal with social issues better as time goes on. I just have to stop, breath and learn that we are on his time table not, mine. I sure love you Kimball!